Mind Ponderer Gifts

Philosophy Department - Are You Really Here?

'I have this nagging fear that everyone is out to make me paranoid!'

Jean-Paul Sartre

"Needs to get a life"

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

'At least I don't have his life.'

"I advised a patient to take responsibilty for his own actions, and now he is suing me!"

The Male Atom: Sex, Sport, War and Good Intentions.

"When will I be old enough to have an inner child?"

"Events seem to be headed in the right direction. Unfortunately, it's not taking me with it."

"The trouble is, professor, you see the Erlenmeyer flask half empty and I see it half full."

'What do lawyers really want, Mr. Montague?'

Max Weber

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

"I've been studying reverse psychology at Tonga Tech Online University."

Telling Self to Buzz Off

are you so alienated from any real form of community that you can no longer distinguish between belonging and conforming?

Psychiatry ward with 'Inhibited' and 'Outgoing' trays.

'I didn't choose art. Art chose me!'

"You what? Well, you darn well ought to have a guilt complex"

"I don't know why I'm here - I don't need a haircut."

'Well, that brings us up to my third birthday...'

That's no big deal, a lot of people get Siskel and Ebert mixed up

Caption Contest TK

'It's not just his insane jealousy - he also insists on choosing all my clothes.'

"Would you look at the carrot on that guy!"

Optimist, Pessimist, Surrealist.

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

"I utilize the best from Freud, the best from Jung and the best from my uncle Marty, a very smart fellow."