Milky Way Tourist Gifts

"No, you're in the Milky Way galaxy."

"Hey! If you're here to marvel at the smallness of your existence within a glorious, vast and unknowable universe, there's a line!"

"Stupid map ... that dot must cover 10,000 cubic light years."

"I can never understand these foreign crop circles."

Blue Origin

* Let's stop here, they seem nice!

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

Statue is moved to hold up the leaning tower of Pisa.

An astronaut sees a sign saying zoning in force.

"You are here"

Celestial Navigation

"I don’t know why we bother traveling—they just missed the entire Milky Way."

Moon Souvenirs

UFO

"So this is where it all ends up. . ."

"I love it....but lose the bodies"

"I never thought I'd say this, but I kinda miss people."

I went to Earth and made crop circles, but all I got was this lousy T-shirt.

Mars-A-Lago

"Could you help me with this?"

'Looks like the Germans were here first.'

'We're not going to Roswell again, it's such a tourist trap.'

'I want to ship Daddy to all the places he missed visiting, because he was working so hard to accumulate the estate I just inherited.'

The suite hereafter.

"A banker?! But that means you don't even HAVE a soulll. . . Damn it - for once the human wins."

Glass Bottom Earth Tours

"We've bookmarked your planet in case we want to come back."

"So you want to see the hot spots, huh?"

'They're more advanced than I thought. It only took him five seconds to refold that map.'

Noah performing X-ray security checks for the ark.

'You won't count my trunk as a carry-on; I have to buy two seats because of my size, and you don't give out complimentary peanuts? Isn't this a jumbo jet?'

Everest Sign in Heaven

"We've bookmarked your planet in case we want to come back."

'No Rashid, I didn't bring the milk... did you?'

"Honk if you know Jesus."