Midwestern Humor Lover Pillows

"What is it with Garrison Keillor and rhubarb pie?"

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

"Call this an iceberg? When I was a kid we wouldn't have called this an iceburg!"

"Hey! I was trained in 1948 and was good enough for then, so it's good enough for now....whipper-snapper!"

'Hand me the 'desperates'.'

Cattlemans Saloon.

"Good grief, Bradbury! How long have you been working at home?"

'Now, Mrs Althorpe, if you think you see the man who assaulted you, we just want you to touch him on the shoulder.' (Mrs Althorpe beats a man up and then says she doesn't recognise any of them)

Sisyphus, 117 million years on

Farmer with gun shots instead of flying ducks

"I hope this isn't the start of an insensitive joke that was once considered funny."

Wanted for Stick Up

"Yes, I can help you with your loan questions. I'm the loan arranger."

The Assistant

Cat cowboy says: 'That ain't no tumbleweed, it's a hairball.'

American Gothic lol

"It's been a struggle for Carlos to adjust to rural life, but now he's finally been accepted as the village idiot."

"Take this, Luke. They say it's impossible to get a decent baguette west of the Pecos."

"Yeah, but I'm sick of the glitter getting all over everything."

'Pa will be right back. He's in the media room, downloading some more homespun wisdom.'

Evacuation Route.

'Yes, I am looking for an experienced cattleman.'

Hillbilly mall maps.

'How very Putney!'

'You can stay, but get your ass out of town!'

"The mosquitoes are coming!"

Doc. Bogle: Specializing in Itchy Trigger Finger.

"Well, I'll be danged-he's got accordion boots."

Cow conkers

Wanted - better artist.

"... Oh, he's the fastest in the west alright... The fastest out of the saloon when it's his round!"