Northern Humor Enthusiast Pillows

OWT - NOWT.

The Games Man: Fishing is his sole form of exercise - but he considers it bad form to move more than his wrist when casting.

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"Welcome to the bank - you'll start at the bottom."

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

"Thor! I am Thor! Ha. Just kidding. I'm Tom the Seagull."

Police Feline Unit

"Clear my schedule for the next five minutes. I feel the need for some spontaneous frivolity."

Formal SuitsBusiness SuitsBirthday Suits.

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Think I preferred the old Irish barman.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

'Why didn't he take 8 days and finish the job properly?'

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

"I call it 'Bad Dog.'"

Speed Dating for Turtles

Doctor examining Easter Island statue.

Faster, Georges, faster!

"Did you sleep awkwardly again?"

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

Selling lemon latt�

Cariactures

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"Yes, I'm from London. 'Which part?' you ask. Well all of me!"

Party of two? No, it was quite a large party.

"Don't flutter your little wings on company time."

Do Not Resuscitate

'Cannonball!'

Here and There Trays

'Senior management wanted me to raise morale so I made Lionel from accounts 'office jester'!'

'Actually, accounting is an exact science.'

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'