Midlife Rebel Gifts

"Knees peeking out of jeans are sexy, but what would you know?"

Baby Boomers...Finance Your Mid Life Crisis Here!

"OK. . .stain, aspirin, water tablet, B12 vitamin, and whisky."

'See? You call my look 'a midlife crisis' but for these guys it's a major TV series.'

"Honestly, Paula, I don't know what I'd do without our daily keggers."

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

"The next song was sixties anthem for the youth subculture of revolution, anarchy and anti-establishment...and can now be heard in elevators worldwide."

"I told you he'd enjoy that more than a Gameboy."

Too old to rock'n'roll now, Sir?

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

Vista Acres - A tanned community.

"My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm...."

Hipster Police Department

"I can't stand working in the office, but I don't mind the commute."

Old man fighting against time with an arm wrestle.

'Judge Bush agreed to come out of retirement on a temporary basis.'

"Look at these old clothes, Dylan! You know, tie-dye HAS made a comeback!"

'I need my lifestyle validated.'

"This next one's for you, babe."

"Ladies and Gentlemen, this seminar is about how to make profits in times of crisis..."

'What does he know about turning a profit? He wasn't even at Woodstock!'

'Lager Lout'- 'Saga Lout'

Beard, socks and sandals.

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

'Hey man that's a gas!'

"I'd prefer this to a gold watch any day."

"I'm living proof that life begins at forty-three."

"I don't know what happened - he was such a good egg."

"I'm old enough to remember when people thought retirement had something to do with not having a job. Don't laugh! We used to believe all sorts of ridiculous stuff!"

'Sorry boys, you're just not rock & roll enough for us.'

"I rolled over my 401K into the football pool."

'No pep, shaky, noisy, overheating. Right. Anything wrong with the car?'

'Museum of Hippy Culture' 'No smoking the Exhibits'

Dirty Old Man

"He's auditioning for a part in 'Conan The Octagenarian'."