Midlife Megaphone Gifts

"Dad hasn't been the same since he went back to school."

"Can the folks in the nose-bleed section hear me alright?!"

Hollywood producer.

Waking Up With Rooster.

'And then the Lord proclaimed, in a loud, thunderous voice...'

"Step right up, lady and gents, and scoop yourself a heaping helping of the best spicy meat and bean stew this side of the mighty Mississippi!"

'It seems with every year my hot flashes get worse.'

'Benson will you stop trying to dominate the meeting.'

Communication

"This next one's for you, babe."

Shouting

"This is a lovely three bedroom detached property, with close proximity to Heathrow and the M25!"

'Not watching this,are you luv?'

"Don't worry about being in your 40's - before you know it, you'll be in your 50's!"

"You see it right?"

"I have heard the mermaids singing, each to each. I told them to pipe down."

Hollywood director.

How's your midlife crisis going, Al? That turned out to be a false alarm, doctor. Today after a heavy lunch I realized it's just a midriff crisis.

"A Party-Political broadcast is due in a minute."

"I'm living proof that life begins at forty-three."

'Listen Buddy! After the hot flushes I've been having this is like a resort!'

'No pep, shaky, noisy, overheating. Right. Anything wrong with the car?'

'I would appreciate it if you don't call out in class.'

"I have difficulty expressing my feelings."

RAF Rapidly Approaching Forty

"In layman's terms, I just rewound your biological clock."

'Business has been terrible all right, but I rather think more likely a midlife crisis.'

Meaningful Negotiations?

'I'm not that concerned about my prostate ... I'm still trying to survive my wife's menopause.'

'He used to live in the fast lane, it's more like a blind alley now.'

"Sorry—just thinking out loud."

'I said 'HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT OF GETTING A HEARING AID?'

Whale Pattern Balding,

"It's a large megaphone to make our voices he heard."

The Sullen 40-To-54-Year-Old Demographic