Mid-life Humorists Pillows

'Believe me, I feel your pain. I pulled a muscle bowling one time.'

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

"We think it has something to do with your genome."

Peter

"Whenever it comes, Glenda, my death will be untimely."

"It's not so much a minivan as it is a hearse for our youth."

"Do you have any books on releasing the tiger within?"

"Actually, I'm pretty sure aging naturally and aging gracefully are mutually exclusive."

Short on top, medium on the sides, and not bald in back.

"He doesn't have to worry about his preschool placement - he interviews well."

"I don't think your old sports jersey shrunk. I think you grew."

'of course it's not natural: He dyes his mane to cover up his grey hair...'

"Warren's too cautious to cure his mid-life crisis with a motorcycle, so he's rebelling by driving shirtless."

'It's really nothing - Looks like baby boomer age spots.'

'Dang.'

Rocket charmer.

'She says her wrinkles are laughter lines, but nothing is that funny!'

Whale Pattern Balding

"Tell me this is just your mid-life crisis."

"I can't right now. My spurs are stuck together."

Castle with parking lot.

Same Sexless Marriage

"Ahem, if you're planning to rob the place could you please get a move on."

"Good news, we found a plant the cured baldness."

'I suppose they call it 'Middle age' because that is where you age shows...'

Dad Socks / Dad Sex

"I'm going to need a hug, Maurice - it's from the A.A.R.P."

"Damn kids and their graffiti."

You know you're getting older when there are more candles on your cake than calories in it!

birthday meets reality

Live: Middle Aged Men

"Riley doesn't bark. He tweets."

'I'm 43, but I'm having it changed to 38 by deed poll.'

Whale Pattern Balding,