Microwave Meal Maven Gifts

TV breakfast

Tonight, on the microwave channel... chicken pot pie!

TV dinners: Standard Widescreen

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

So Far So Good

"It's your ribs. I'm afraid they're delicious."

Woman watching cookery show on TV while cooking a microwave meal.

I'm sorry, Miss. I can't involve the bouncer just to "teach somebody a lesson." Menu.

"We'd like bruschetta, and we'd like it pronounced correctly."

A family gets ready for their microwave meal on the patio.

"You're not fooling me. I can spot 'fake mews'."

"And tonight we’re offering 5-1 odds on a kitchen strike."

'Waiter, I don't remember ordering this gristle!'

"I'm leaving you for someone who does care what we have for dinner."

"Here's our everything's included meal kit. How do they stuff a cook and dishwasher in there?"

"It's a sprain in your left porterhouse."

'Hi, I'm Raoul...I shall be your talking point of the evening.'

'Come on, stop playing and eat your dinner before it freezes again...'

"Same thing every morning. Crack of Don at the crack of dawn."

'How do we bake such delicious large muffins that have only 20 calories? Easy, false advertising.'

Wordplay: Road Rage

'I think I may be lactose intolerant.'

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

Little Dark Specks

'Leave me alone. I'm resting my steak.'

"I've heard of instant Karma, but I didn't know there was a microwavable version."

"Quick, get it while its molecules are still vibrating."

"Would you like to look at the menu sir?"

'That's strange. No ingredient labelling anywhere!'

"Just who is our new interactive toaster interacting with?"

'You should have read the cookery book for teenagers. It's pretty short: 'Take the food off the package before you microwave it'.'

"If you're too cheap to buy a new microwave, then hurry up with that so I can get dinner started."

'Welcome to Margie's Microwave Cooking School! -- ZAP! Be sure to tune in at this same time tomorrow....'

'I made you coffee.'

"Would you care to see a list of food additives?"