Messy Moments Manager Gifts

"Wet wipe?"

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

"Again? This is the last time I'm letting you wear the pants with the little zipper."

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

"All in favor of destroying the throw pillow, raise your paw."

"Why, you little Shih Tzu."

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

'Good girl, Carol - now hands up all those who have lost their pens.'

When the world is Mud-luscious - e.e. cummings

"Does knowing you're being watched on a baby monitor keep you out of mischief?"

Mittens is challenged by the string.

Child about to jump off ironing board into bath.

Monkey Curling Lion's Mane.

"Have mercy on me, Mama. Have mercy on Mr. Pitiful."

'Everything I say to you goes in one ear and out the other.'

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

Dogs life

'He licked all my tongue depressors.'

Why would birdie need newspaper?

'It was the little darling's first time sitting up at the dining table!'

"Thank God you're home. Someone crapped on the carpet again."

'The part I love is when they come home and say 'WHO did this?. . .'

"I fell in the mud again. Maybe I need a stunt double."

The day Bob finally understood radiation of species.

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: I need backup...NOW!

"While you were out, the staff whittled away your desk into a totem pole."

Two children play with a pedal bin

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

'You know that bottle of ink that was standing on the desk...?'

'Should-do and shouldn't-do sound a lot alike.'

"Apart from that, Bob, what else did you learn on the team-building paintball weekend?"

'Don't worry, son. This bed inking incident will be our little secret.'