Merciful Mathematician Gifts

'You borrowed $27,000 over the years to study computer sciences. According to our files, you now owe us $1.83.'

"Oh, stop it. You are not at all obtuse." Complimentary angles make the other angles feel good about themselves.

"Arithmetic gets a lot harder when you run out of fingers and toes."

"And anyway we'd be no good in bed - I've done the math."

"I love the equation that describes the slope of your nose."

'I've crunched the numbers and you can afford to increase my allowance by 15.5%.'

"In pre-school I was an overachiever. Now, in first grade, math is threatening my reputation."

'Very good, Jeffrey! - You are so creative!'

'The math is more complex this year and some of you won't be able to just tap out your answers anymore.'

'The batteries in my calculator just died. Good thing I kept the instructions on how to count on my fingers.'

'I have a math test tomorrow, Sir, and I could use a godsend multiplicationwise.'

Formula.

'Confirming the belief that music and math are related, I will now sing some lovely French equations.'

"Are we allowed to pray?"

Mathematics.

'How would you describe yourself?'

Alternative Accountants

"I don't really have a favourite. I love you both equally."

How scientists propose

'Math is more art than science.'

"Darling, you complete me!"

Junior Accountant

'What do you mean it's wrong? In Ethics we learnt that the truth is always objective!'

'.. and what about dogs born on February 29th?'

"When I listen to Mozart, the numbers just seem to crunch themselves."

'It's my theory of probability.'

"I'm sorry, but you do not qualify for the home office credit."

"My Y-variable obviously has a value inconsistent with the desired solution."

How do you remember your lock combination?

'Can Ganesh come and help deliver a business plan. . .'