Menu Mavens Gifts

"Would you like to look at the menu sir?"

'Hi, I'm Raoul...I shall be your talking point of the evening.'

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

"This is our soft opening."

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

"I'll have the spaghetti, does that come on toast?"

'Shall we bother with the sweet, chubby-chops?'

"For dessert, absolutely no flambé!"

'Surely they're not ALL still in their offices!'

'...and one 'death by chocolate', Sir.'

Government survey into the effects of haggis throwing in Ethiopia.

"I’ll have something for you as soon as Table Seven sees the entrée prices."

'Isn't that the ghastly couple we met last summer in Rock?'

Man with a 'menu', woman with a 'womenu'.

"We'll just have the loaves and fishes. . ."

"The holiday roast has yams, petters, carrots, pumpkin, parsnips, and tomato. What shall we call it?"

Lady in Card Shop sees Sympathy Cards section with 'Bear Market', 'Falling Dollar' and 'Inflation' categories.

"Will you be ordering A La Carte, or heading straight over to the trough?"

"Well, what's your recommendation?"

Vegan Restaurant: ''amburgers! Sausages! RISSOLES!'

'I can't have you spending all of your money on fancy restaurants like this, Jeff.'

The Cattle show Week.

"It's your ribs. I'm afraid they're delicious."

'We'll skip that rubbish.'

"I have to start thinking out of the box."

"This doesn't have anything to do with the falling price of oil, does it?"

'Could I just get one that's wine flavored?'

"I see the businessman's lunch is up 50p."

"Veal or non-veal?"

"I'm not a food critic I'm a literary critic and I've found the prose on your menu to be second-rate."

"We'd like bruschetta, and we'd like it pronounced correctly."

"How do I know if it's fresh?... You asked for 'the soup of the day'. You didn't specify what day."

"Take your time. Breakfast is the most important meal of the day."

"We call it 'dish' of the day, but it's actually served on a plank of wood."