Menu Browser T-Shirts

"Nothing, thanks - I'm just looking."

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

'Ooo! The dog food sounds good! ... mind you, I always have that at home.'

Fast Food Menu Selections

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"Well I wouldn't eat it, but don't let that put you off."

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"Anything but milk and cookies."

"This place is famous for its short fiction about food."

"That's a plain burger and black coffee? But what kind of plain burger and what kind of black coffee?"

"We'll start with the appetizer, move on to the entree, and then finish up with dessert."

"The chef recommends the tilapia. However, I really like the vodka."

"Can I tell you about a few items that aren't on the menu?"

National Coffee Day

"I recommend number five if you have only $20 so that you can still leave a tip."

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

Coffee Menu

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

"Oh sorry, those are the Ten Commandments. Hang on, I'll get you a menu."

Coffee

"If Sinatra had eaten here he'd have loved it."

'Whatever he's eating.'

'Now what? Everything I can pronounce is OFF!'