Menu Manager T-Shirts

"The chef will accommodate gluten-free requests, but only with a note from your doctor."

"Ooh, that looks delicious! Does it photograph well?"

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

'Ooo! The dog food sounds good! ... mind you, I always have that at home.'

Fast Food Menu Selections

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

'Men order. . . women shop.'

Frank and Ernie's Diner. We're all out of pressed duck, sir, but I can put the squeeze on some chicken for you.

'Wine, high octane grape juice.'

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

'We don't know which gate flight 311 to Denver is boarding. These are the menus.'

"Well I wouldn't eat it, but don't let that put you off."

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

"Anything but milk and cookies."

"The chef recommends the tilapia. However, I really like the vodka."

"This place is famous for its short fiction about food."

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

"We'll start with the appetizer, move on to the entree, and then finish up with dessert."

"That's a plain burger and black coffee? But what kind of plain burger and what kind of black coffee?"

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

"Can I tell you about a few items that aren't on the menu?"

'Well, if you're going to order 'left wings' and I'm going to order 'right,' maybe we should just order burgers instead.'

National Coffee Day

'Whatever he's eating.'

Coffee Menu