Mental Attitude Explorer T-Shirts

'I'm not going to get ill, I'm not going to get ill. . . cough. . . dammit!'

In the future, human thought will enter an age of clarity and purity never before dreamed of.

The Map of the human brain

'...when did you first get these feelings of wanting to be a psychiatrist?'

Sigmund Freud.

X-ray Psychology.

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

Unguided imagery

The Chicken Who Crossed the Road, in therapy. My motives are always being questioned!

"Yes, sir, Dave. Out here, under the big sky, I always get back in touch with who I am."

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

Roland, the schizophrenic cowboy.

'Care to join in some of my avoidance behaviour?'

". . . but he's almost four and he hasn't been labelled yet!"

"Have you tried just giving your head a shake?"

I applied for a job with NASA but they turned me down. I think it was because I told them I wanted to be an astronaut because in space, you can't cry because there's no gravity and tears can't flow.

"Nobody listens to me complain quite like you do."

"I should warn you that many of John's thoughts are subliminal."

'Enlightenment-shmenlightenment - what I'm worried about is tenure!'

'Sometimes I think if it wasn't for Lucy here, I'd go mad.'

'What do lawyers really want, Mr. Montague?'

"You'll never be a full participant in your mental health care if you keep saying wacky things."

"My System 1 tells me she's articulate, capable, shrewd. My System 2 says BIMBO."

"I had that dream again where you're writing down all my fears and anxieties and working them into a screenplay."

"Don't step on the blacks or the nasty bogie man will get you!"

"I owe all my success to the psychiatrist who gave me the word GREED as my mantra!"

"If find people express themslves more freely in traffic jams."

Ins and Outs of Sex Therapy

Unsmiley face at the psychiatrist...

'There is nothing physically wrong. It needs a psychiatrist.'

Psychologist is SHOCKED by what his elderly patent is telling him.

"You have got to want to change."

Lost and Profound.

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

'You get into arguments even when you talk to yourself ?'