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"You're too self-critical."

"What does that one look like to you?"

Freudian vs Behavior therapist.

'Your fear of being publicly exposed as a fraud is a stress-related disorder called 'Imposter Syndrome.' It's common among people in high-profile authority positions, and, of course, in actual phonies like you!'

Psychologist to man with many pictures of him: 'Let's talk about this new obsession.'

'Actually, I became a psychiatrist because the voices told me to.'

"I'll say a normal word, then you say the first sick thing that pops into your head."

'Rorschach! What's to become of you!'

Psychiatrist with a patient who is hiding under the couch.

"Now, we can get all those repressed memories the easy way or the hard way."

'Every time I try to get in touch with my inner self, she's out to lunch.'

'I feel guilty about my clear conscience.'

InIn Deeper

When you sit down, you get a shock. Open a book, you get a shock. Write something, another shock. It's a typical psychology class.

"No. You're not going crazy... You just need an outlet."

"I also have trouble sleeping. I don't understand why. No one I talk to seems to have any trouble falling asleep."

'Always remember that you are unique, just like everyone else.'

Ed was in therapy for believing he was a therapist.

Roland, the schizophrenic cowboy.

Psychiatrist analysing Sigmund Freud.

"Good—now put it back."

'Rorschach! What's to become of you?'

'How are the new relaxation techniques going?'

'How long have you had this need to be in control?'

Brain maze

"Oh, and I've started seeing a therapist."

'It's a basic human trait - in order to gain social acceptance people will agree with whoever they're talking to at the time.'

Psychologist interrupting a patient trying to tell her people don't let him finish what he's saying.

'If he continues treatment for the next month or so I should have enough material for my book of case histories.' 'If I continue treatment for another month or so, I should have enough material for my expose of psychoanalysis.'

'The level of my tolerance is only surpassed by the stupidity of people who don't share my opinion.'

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

"Nobody understands you?What exactly do you mean by that?"

Freudian Slip

"There's nothing wrong with your computer, I think it's all in your head."

'I usually say what I think.'. . .'I usually think what I say.'