Medieval Historian Gifts

"To begin with, I would like to express my sincere thanks and deep appreciation for the opportunity to meet with you. While there are still profound differences between us, I think the very fact of my presence here today is a major breakthrough."

Peasants Revolt (Casual Dress).

'This ought to teach them a lesson.'

"You don't need a claim ticket... I'll know which one is yours."

Man In The Stocks Used As A Clock

"Methinks hitting 'Reply to all' doth you a disservice, sire."

"You guys on my left, go ahead and take a whack at it. The rest of you wait right there."

Medieval soldiers on a bouncy castle

'If you say, 'arrowing experience once more, I'm going to thump you.'

'Your task will be to save the castle from catapulted rocks.'

'This isn't either tough love...'

Knight/Bird.

'. . . while the weight of the armour . . .'

Suit of Armor. . . Sport of Coat of Armor

"Manfred, don't get so defensive!"

"There's been a change in plans. Instead of Abilene, we're going to Camelot."

"For now, I want you to stay off siege ladders."

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

Frontispiece to the first volume of 'Master Humphrey's Clock'

"We're following Carrot Top."

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

Knight Golfing

Servant brings king skateboard on pillow.

Knight feeding his kids.

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"He's his own worst enemy."

Joust Sharpener

"When I ask questions, I expect answers!"