Medical Trial Enthusiast Gifts

"Now, of the twelve drugs we've tested on you, which one tasted best?"

Trial by Media

Doctor describes inside guts while patient has black thoughts.

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

'A problem with the Phase II trials. Everyone - all the people - was given the placebo, and no one got the drug.'

Little doctor.

Coming Soon - Maternity Clinic. Coming Soon After - Law Firm Dealing in Medical Malpractice.

"The good news is that your cardiac surgery was a complete success. The bad news is that we had to remove the song from your heart."

'Hah! The joke's on you — I already thought up a second opinion!'

"You can't plead cute."

London GPs could become an endangered species.

"When was the last time anyone checked on Mr Klink."

"Never mind what I did, Your Honor. I want to be judged for who I am, as an individual."

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

"The doctor was more lucid today! That's a good sign!"

"I'd delighted your son wants to be a surgeon.. but that no reason to let let him practice on you."

Parts Department

'We're playing doctor ??" Billy's the anesthetist.'

Doctors

"Fruity nose, hints of wild cherry, soothing on the palate, goes well with cough and cold."

Medical Examinations.

'You've a slipped disc in your back and a slipped everything in your front.'

'Maggots.' - playing doctor

"That settles it. I'm moving for a retrial."

'You were right, you are in the placebo group.'

Jurors saying 'I'm on the jury' on their mobiles.

So you'd like to be a lawyer...we require honest, genuine people, who are prepared to...learn how to fake sincerity.

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

'Urology...can you hold?'

"I object, Your Honor! This line of questioning is really weird."

'If you begin to feel unwell, start or stop taking aspirin...'

Counsel's Opinion.

''Not guilty'? -- oh, in denial, are we?'

Doctor testing patient reflexes with unusual results.

'I was a junior doctor when I started this shift.'