Medical Gadget Lover Pillows

Sensor technology needs to more compact

'Wait 'til you see our new defibrillator. It's a Michael Graves design.'

"Here comes the super-visor."

'Having all this information on my patient's diagnostics is great, but I think I need a degree in data analytics to sort it all out...'

"Just think of this prescription as an app for your body...with side effects."

Medical Bling: "Help!" on a rope, Important info, O2 4U, Snazzy 3-prong

Hold on - it may take a few minutes for his new pacemaker to sync with his Fitbit.

'Our new multi-syringe will take care of all your allergies in one fell swoop.'

'This new diet drug comes as a pill, patch, or as a phone app with Siri saying, don't eat so much.'

"I'm just browsing."

We'd like to run a few tests to see how this thing works.

"I think that's the newest machine replacing the new machine we just installed."

'Careful - that new bed is a little touchy.'

"Oh, oh...I detect traces of tree nuts...where's my epipen?"

Patient

Health Care Parade

'Of course it's not downloading your iTunes. That's your 24-hour heart monitor.'

Nurse sharpening a needle before an injection.

"I feel fine but according to my new watch I might be DEAD!"

'Call Maintenance...I need them to check the output on this defibrillator.'

"I knew the romance had left our relationship when he bought me a new sphygmomanometer for Valentine's Day!"

"I'd hate to be hooked up to that thing."

Yes, ma'am. As soon as we reach an altitude of 10,000 feet, you may turn his pacemaker back on.

Another successful opertation for "Brett's Bumper Bandage."

Dr. Jarvik, and his lesser known invention, the artificial soul.

"The good news is your virus is gone. The bad news is it infected your electronic health records."

'When I use my iPod, my implantable defibrillator kicks in.'

'Oops! Turn down the power on this lazer thing, will you.'

"Don't worry, Mr. Jones. The fact that doctors still use pagers doesn't mean the hospital has outdated equipment!"

"Your electronic medical records were accidentally deleted. You'll have to start over again with acne."

'Brain surgery app.'

'You'll have to disrobe... what I have here is a new improved Proctoscope.'

'This less-weight app is great! It suggested I lie my mobile down on the scale instead of stepping on it myself and look - less-weight!'

'It's his pacemaker. h3e's not supposed to go near the refrigerator.'

'I can't examine you, but your health insurance does allow you access to a self-diagnosing website.'