Medical Tech Enthusiast Pillows

"The good news is your virus is gone. The bad news is it infected your electronic health records."

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

Little doctor.

"The good news is that your cardiac surgery was a complete success. The bad news is that we had to remove the song from your heart."

'Hah! The joke's on you — I already thought up a second opinion!'

"When was the last time anyone checked on Mr Klink."

Guide to Contagious Diseases.

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

"I'd delighted your son wants to be a surgeon.. but that no reason to let let him practice on you."

'We don't have a cure for your ailment but there is an appropriate app available.'

Parts Department

Doctors

Medical Examinations.

'Still no improvement? Nurse, attach more gizmos.'

'You've a slipped disc in your back and a slipped everything in your front.'

'Maggots.' - playing doctor

'Urology...can you hold?'

'Having all this information on my patient's diagnostics is great, but I think I need a degree in data analytics to sort it all out...'

Doctor testing patient reflexes with unusual results.

Cardiology, Neurology and Ophthalmology.

'I was a junior doctor when I started this shift.'

'Howard, I wish you'd stop bring your work home with you.'

"It appears you have a virus."

"This feels so familiar."

"I can't find the instructions."

"Just think of this prescription as an app for your body...with side effects."

"And now to check the patient's reflexes."

'In simple terms, bacterial infections can be treated with anti-biotics such as penicillin - whereas a virus is something yur computer gets.'

'Isn't medical progress marvellous? If we'd been sat here a hundred years ago, we'd be dead by now!'

'Let's see now...'

Nothing like a Valentine from my boyfriend David... the cardiologist.

'You have echolalia — it's very common among politicians.'

'It's not global warming. It's 'Hot Flashes'.'

'Level with me, Doc — it's contagious, isn't it?'

As a doctor I can only tell you that the jury is still out as regards the benefits of cannabis in a medical context,however it is my personal opinion that this particular sample would make one bitchin spliff.