Medical Tech Enthusiast Pillows

"The good news is your virus is gone. The bad news is it infected your electronic health records."

There's no such thing as a triple carburetor bypass!

Little doctor.

"The good news is that your cardiac surgery was a complete success. The bad news is that we had to remove the song from your heart."

'Hah! The joke's on you — I already thought up a second opinion!'

"When was the last time anyone checked on Mr Klink."

'G-g-golly! One day out of med school and I'm about to perform brain surgery! Just look at that scalpel shake!'

'We don't have a cure for your ailment but there is an appropriate app available.'

"I'd delighted your son wants to be a surgeon.. but that no reason to let let him practice on you."

Parts Department

Doctors

Medical Examinations.

'Still no improvement? Nurse, attach more gizmos.'

'You've a slipped disc in your back and a slipped everything in your front.'

'Maggots.' - playing doctor

'Urology...can you hold?'

'Having all this information on my patient's diagnostics is great, but I think I need a degree in data analytics to sort it all out...'

Doctor testing patient reflexes with unusual results.

Cardiology, Neurology and Ophthalmology.

'I was a junior doctor when I started this shift.'

"This feels so familiar."

"Just think of this prescription as an app for your body...with side effects."

"It appears you have a virus."

'Howard, I wish you'd stop bring your work home with you.'

"And now to check the patient's reflexes."

'Isn't medical progress marvellous? If we'd been sat here a hundred years ago, we'd be dead by now!'

'In simple terms, bacterial infections can be treated with anti-biotics such as penicillin - whereas a virus is something yur computer gets.'

'You have echolalia — it's very common among politicians.'

Nothing like a Valentine from my boyfriend David... the cardiologist.

'Let's see now...'

'It's not global warming. It's 'Hot Flashes'.'

As a doctor I can only tell you that the jury is still out as regards the benefits of cannabis in a medical context,however it is my personal opinion that this particular sample would make one bitchin spliff.

'Level with me, Doc — it's contagious, isn't it?'