Medical Anomaly Buff Gifts

"You will die by a single bullet to the heart...just one final question - any history of dextrocardia?"

"The bottle says that 'Extreme Hair Growth' is a rare side effect of this medication."

'See? The idiots put my danged knee replacement in backward!'

"We need to update your entire operating system."

'The doctors all tell me that you have great medical insurance. They think your coverage might last through most of the tests that they have scheduled.'

Man with arrow in back - "We're going to run some tests to see if it's psychosomatic."

"We're doing everything we can to make him comfortable, short of dressing up as male doctors."

'...but besides this, how are you doing?'

Cures for Ye Plague

First clue that the latest medical breakthrough isn't quite there yet - 'Don't worry, I had the same thing...'

"I'm only flesh and blood. And, of course, collagen."

"There are 206 bones in your body...How would you like one more?"

'I know just how you feel.'

"Relax, I'm only hear to see my osteopath."

'Why are you giving me an allergy shot. Shouldn't you be giving me an anti-allergy shot?'

"I had no idea that exercising my right of immunity meant this."

'We can't determine if you're telling the truth, but you should have a doctor check your pressure.'

"And as if that wasn't bad enough. They've discovered that I'm allergic to bandages!"

Fart Sample.

Water: the first medicine

Medical Curiosities

'Yes we can cure you - but the bigger problem now is: can you afford it?'

"Milton finally found a doctor he can trust - one who still believes in the healing power of money."

"But the P.R. guy says he's going to be O.K."

'Lucky for you there was a safety net.'

"Your D.N.A. test shows you're predisposed to sue doctors."

"In case we have to go back in."

"I'm from Special Ops."

Consultation of Physicians.

'How's my Surger? Call 1-600 Lawsuit.'

"Now where was I?"

Morty likes a holistic approach... sex, cigarettes, pillow talk and then death.

"Don't be alarmed. It's just our technician photo-bombing your X-ray."

"No, we're not going to reanimate. We're going to sell them to medical schools."

'No, no, the pills don't have any medication to improve your balance. You'll just get steadier on your feet by trying to catch pills that are thrown to you.'