Media Cynic Gifts

"So much for the news, now for the corrections."

'You don't know what the heck you're talking about! How would you like to be a TV pundit?'

'It's like home from home, really-rubbish telly, lousy grub..'

Warning! The next programme contains no celebrities.

"It's not fair. I'm a celebrity. Half the stuff written about me isn't even true."

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

"VP J.D. Vance called Donald: 'cynical asshole,' a 'moral disaster,' a 'total fraud,' an 'idiot,' and suggested he might be 'America’s Hitler.'"

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

'Everything is illusory? -- Even reality shows?'

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

"Taxation with representation hasn't worked out so well." (two men at the US capital talking taxes and politics)

"Dear, if the news stresses you out so much, turn it off!"

"I'm back from Russia. Putin offered me a Dacha to say he's an honest man."

"Let's wait for it to come out on cable and then not watch it."

"We've now got a higher approval rating than the media."

'Confused about your future, depressed, lacking confidence, not sure who you can trust...I'd suggest you avoid any election news and watch modern family instead.'

The first accurate poll.

"Oh, the usual bills and a friendly reminder from Satan that there's a special place in Hell reserved just for us, but only if we ACT NOW, blah, blah, blah."

Defend the Cult of Militant Nonviolence!

"Would you say your politics are middle of the road?"

'Oh I've always been a sceptic, through all my past lives.'

"Son, remember - its possible most politicians lie - it's the American way."

"Podcasts, blech. It's like eavesdropping without the intrigue."

IN CASE OF EMERGENCY: CLEAN UNDERWEAR

Cornucopia Prime

Finally, a news network that doesn't fill me up...it's 97 fact free!

"I'd better read the official view before I form an opinion."

"Call me a cockeyed optimist, but I think we can fool all the people all the time!"

Politician's mask

"Am I covered for the brain cell damage caused by your TV commercials?"

"Of course your data isn't really in a cloud. That's almost as silly as thinking your money is actually in this bank."

"My wife is a doctor. That's great because I can endure the TV news only under general anesthesia."

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, BOO! Did I scare you? Regards, Rick in Seattle. (Actual reader letter). Ask Sadie at asksadieshow@gmail.com. Yeah, I'm really scared. Aren't you, Rudy? Boo, Rudy! Boooooo! That, however, terrifies me. Sorry, you were saying? Some guy tweeted his breakfast menu.(This cartoon was originally published on 2014-07-07)

"Oh my God have you seen this sh-"

"I prefer a politician who is deeply religious but also doesn’t take any of that nonsense seriously."