Mechanical Humor Lover Pillows

"Me?! I thought you brought a washer!"

Electric Blanket.

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

'Your car should run fine now. I reformatted the hard drive, increased the ram, scanned for viruses, updated the firmware, upgraded to this year's processor...'

'...need to design something to bridge the generation gap.'

'Some hackers have broken into the system. It goes in as molten steel, and it comes out as chicken gumbo soup.'

'I think I've got a screw loose.'

"The are 10 types of people in the world - those who understand binary and those who don't."

"It's garage music."

"There - now we're environmentally responsible."

Every time one of us gets a new head, those two think it's funny to call it "the changing of the gourd."

'Found your problem - there was a hairball in the gasline.'

'Well, if I have a short circuit, just lengthen it.'

"Is it really necessary to shout 'Nailed it!' every time you hammer a nail?"

Auto Mechanic's Confessional Booth

'I knew this would be easy. We built it last year.'

'Batteries not included, it's a real cat.'

The Rarely Seen Gas-Powered Eel

"I told him to trim a couple of inches off the middle and he thought it was a fat remark."

"They said it had a V-8, so I assumed it would run on tomato juice!"

'I think I found your missing nut.'

Awareness!...

"One CC of lubricant after meals, okay?"

"And this, gentlemen, is what one of our typical American workers looks before he gets fired!"

'Try it now.'

"The microwave isn't working and I needed to heat my lunch."

"The replacement part is $28, but cost will be $3,200 after we dismantle half the engine to install it."

Builders discussing a new chimney

"Just what I thought... Bad shock absorbers."

"Hey, I saw you on the cover of Assembly Line Illustrated!!"

'So, are you saying that in the future I shouldn't open any email attachments labeled, 'deadly computer virus'?'

Does it come with an anti virus package?

'M.O.T. certificate?!...a death certificate's the best I can do.'

It's only firing on 87 cylinders.

'Oh, here comes trouble - spanner enters workplace full of cogs!'