Mealtime Jokester Pillows

"Ladies ladies, please. There's enough of me to go around."

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

"You owe me five bucks."

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Don't go out in the rain without an umbrella....was probably not 'his idea' of a tip, dear!'

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

A man and his baby are wearing bibs with images of what they are eating.

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

'Bless this food we are about to receive, all except the broccoli. Bless the apple pie twice.'

Onion operation.

Couple sharing the plastic widget from a pizza box like a chicken's wish bone

'Can't we have something other than curry for a change?'

'I wish you'd make those meatballs a little lighter; they hurt!'

"It's not he worst meal I've ever eaten, that was your dinner yesterday."

"Honey, will you text grace, please?"

'The doctor said I was ready for solids, but not this solid!'

'Waiter! There's no hair in my soup!'

"Are you sure this is the Irish guacamole?"

"J'entends le poulet qui arrive!"

'Are you still eating your breakfast? I want to lay the table for lunch.'

"Oh, how nice. You're just in time to cut the vegetables,"

"The trick to this particular dish is not letting your mother mess it up."

'What's your favourite meal?' 'Seconds.'

"If you must paw something, why don't you hit the snooze button?"

Sometimes the 'Staggers-in-at-4 AM Bird' beats the Early Bird to the worm.

'Waiter there is a candlestick in my soup!'

"When no one's looking, I'm cramming this entire ball of pasta in my mouth."

'Blackened Fish: Cook until the smoke detector goes off.'

'Frank! Cut that out and get back to work!'

"Can I get you your bill sir?"

"I think it's the spoon you want, I'm a confirmed spatula."

Try to cut down on your salt intake.