Meal Mischief-maker Pillows

"How did I find my lamb chop? Well, I lifted up a roast potato and there it was."

Kid in time-out writes 'it was the best of time out...'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Only a penny! A sensible and ingenious toy for children.

Newt sale

'No, you can't use your last wish, to wish for another three wishes!'

Oh no ... Outsourcing

'Meat cooked, but carrots still hard.' Hand in pot

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's pimping the wall!'

'Guess what I'd like to see disappear next.'

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

"How do you prepare the chicken?"

'I couldn't practice last night on account of my Dad's head was gonna' explode.'

Hallowe'en wake up call

Child jumping on a table-tennis table.

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

"I've just discovered this brilliant new ingredients."

"When I said 'I'm leaving' this morning I meant for the office"

Occupational Hazards.

'In the middle of the second movement, Rodney's worst fears were realized; Phillippe began to sing along.'

'You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off. . .!'

'My fortune says you're a liar, so I won't even ask what yours says.'

"Looks like we left out the wrong brownies."

Mozart swimming.

'I'm sorry, I laughed when I saw you in spite of myself!'

'You still have breakfast and lunch on your dinner menu.'

The invisible man makes a pancake

"They've agreed to drop the charges, but only if you agree never to stuff the turkey again."

"I'm in the national team...not because I'm a good player, but because everybody panics when I start singing the anthem!"

'Good morning!'

Timpani for the devil

'You ordered the stuffed sea bass, didn't you?'

'According to the previous exercise's logic, this time the result must be six.'

'I'd like an older brother, please.'