Match Day Adventurer Gifts

"I promised I'd bring him - he could never afford to come when he was alive."

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

"You keep an eye on our horse. I'm checking to see if the bookie runs off with our money."

Beer Order

'Not much gets past our new goalie!'

He was a nerd. But he was her nerd.

Tennis ball girl.

Would madam like me to send over the sympathy steward?

"It's an app that lets me know when I'm bored."

'You can't beat the excitement of a new county season.'

Rugby Players and Supporters Essential Supplies

Soccer games took on a whole new meaning for the parents of Hillsdale Youth Soccer.

'But Mum, I've got a match after school...'

"Depressed, anxious, worried about the future we've had a great deal of this recently...I'd suggest you avoid watching England for a while."

'If you're proposing, Nigel, get it done before full time!'

The Rugby Throw Up.

"So, after five glorious weeks, football is coming home!"

'We're in a hurry.'

'If it's a game of two halves, how come you're on your third pint?'

'Don't even think about it!'

'I'm dreading the World Cup . . .'

'Going 'cold turkey' might be dangerous...I'd wean him off by letting him watch world cup re-runs....'

'This paintball war has really spun out of control.'

Super Bowl 2012: The NFL finds a way to appease displaced ticket holders.

'Let's buy the one that has the game on it.'

'Not watching this,are you luv?'

'But enough about my interiority, how about you?'

World Cup Football Enthusiasm!

'I wonder who they'll bring on as manager for the second half.'

Bowled out.

"Damn! Trust me to get a seat behind the umpire!"

'Structural strength test? Next door!'

A football fan chews a football as his team concedes.

'I don't think you are going to see the end of this match with that 4-4-2 formation.'

"Did you know 'fajitas' is Spanish for 'tiny girdles'?"