Master Of The Sick Day Gifts

"Well you can't possibly be expected to perform as lead dancer with the Bolshoi Ballet with a bad back...have a note for three months and see how you feel."

"I won't be in today. I've decided to live off the land."

Get Well Soon and Hurry Back to the Office. . . Before Sharks Eat Your Job

"Here's the deal, throw me back and I won't text your boss telling him you called in sick to fish."

"If I've timed this right, symptoms should start at exactly 9 a.m. Monday."

"I don't feel like going to school. Isn't that a flu-like symptom?"

'Another sick note from your employer !'

"He's never had a day off work through illness. He always stretches it to a week!"

'Can't come in to work today. I'm in bed with a nasty bug.'

"You better take Teddy's temperature too....he was awfully sick this morning!"

'Tell the doctor that I'm too sick to see him.'

'Have you heard of the Phrase,'Survival of the fittest'?' 'Uh-ho!'

'If you have a toothache, take the day off, you would be useless at work anyway...'

"I don't think I'm going to be in today, I got a bit wrecked at the weekend."

"How am I? I'm just trying to et over the flu in time for allergy season."

"Fever, chills and dizziness. Sounds like you have a Math test at work today."

'While you're in there, could you get me a beer? I'd get up myself, but I'm out of motion sickness medication.'

"I've lost my voice. Is it contagious?"

'I'm sorry, Mr. Harris is not here. In fact nobody's here. I think it's a staff infection!'

'I couldn't decide what to wear to work so I just didn't go.'

'I'm still pretty unwell, I'm not sure if I'll be in the office tomorrow.'

I can't come in today. I haven't got chronic diarrhoea!

Woman watches TV wrapped up in warm clothing.

'Has there ever been such a sickly group of rugged individualists.'

"I forgot to call in dead."

Go home and take your cold with you.

"Fred is the counterpoint to a perpetual motion machine."

'If I work at home and I'm sick, do I have to go to the office?'

'Mr. Breeding won't be in today - so you people at the office have fun.'

"It's your work. Are you still sick or what?"

"It's not the flu. I got a very bad case of tired blood."

"Walt won't be at work today - he's flipped on his back!"

'Take ten days off work.'

'I can't come to work today. I'm in bed with some kind of bug.'

'The good news is that we're going to name the disease after you.'