Master Of Delay Gifts

The Procrastinatorium.

Procrastinator's Leap.

Procrastinator Hall of Fame

Pro Procrastination

"The Procrastination World Championships were only a month away. He never trained so hard."

"Hold my calls, Kimberly. I'm with a ball of string."

Procrastinator Foumdation: 'We're putting off the decision to fund you for at least another month...'

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

Sisyphus Gets a Desk Job.

"I figured my stress ball should match the size of my anxiety."

The artist wakes refreshed, creative juices flowing.

"Let's face it, this meeting isn't about tightening our work schedule. It's about stretching our deadline."

"Some days, no matter how much you procrastinate, work still gets done."

'Doctor says I've got an enlarged procrastinate.'

'Hey, we have one of those. You hang your laundry on it.'

'Never put off till tomorrow something you can put off till the day after tomorrow...'

Inactive wear store.

'The only game my Dad knows is playing possum.'

"For the last time - do not call me when I'm pretending to work."

"I like office work, it fascinates me. I can sit and look at it for hours!"

"Congratulations on your entertaining presentation skills Smith, and the way they hide your dismal sales figures!"

"Shouldn't you boys be out fighting crime somewhere?" "Yeah, yeah, whatever." "I could use another beer while you're up." "I ain't goin' on no airplane!" "Anyone pay the cable bill?" The A-Hole Team

'In just ten years he's accomplished what has taken others weeks to do.'

"You said you'd be 'five minutes,’ nine months ago."

"You know, there are also some people who should never have children, hint hint...."

Deadline

"You probably don't need to write 'sorry for the delayed reply' every time, Natasha."

"He's faking it to get out of school. Bring in his teacher and run some tests."

'Life's too short to hold grudges.' 'No it's not! You just need to organize your time better.'

Servant talking to her old master about her new position

'While Dewey distracts the defense, the quarterback simply jogs into the end zone untouched.'

"I always put things off until the last minute."

'When someone asks where you work, what do you tell them?'

'He was right at his desk a moment ago.'

'Fermat's Next-to-Last Theorem'