Mascot Fan Gifts

"Mr. Peanut is my dad—you can call me Rick."

"Pardon my glove."

"It's not a mascot! It's not a mascot!"

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

A man washing a mascot costume

'It gets to the point where fans don't respond the way they used to. You need an edge, something more...' Cougar Charlie goes public about his long-standing battle with drugs.

"That's our new church mascot."

No poking doughboy

'The proliferation of bird watchers make me more and more self-conscious...'

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

"Happy St Patrick’s Day"

Head over Hooves

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

Wolf Karaoke

"Yeah, I'm moonlighting. It's a living."

"Cthulhus, sir. Thousands of 'em."

Three lanes of traffic with the first two lanes crowded with turtles. The third lane (to the left) a couple rabbits speeding along without any traffic. An easy pass sign has carrots replacing dollars.

Zombie pet tricks.

Bessy had won the 100m sprint... but many suspected Steeroid abuse!

'I hate waking up with coffin hair.'

"Stop squawking. Use your words."

Vampire collects bottles of blood from his doorstep.

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

"Do I have to go out again!?"

Halloween Selfie

'Sorry about this, but I really need a rug for my bachelor pad.'

At a secluded, candle-lit dinner, love rears its ugly head.

"I found the perfect summer job! 'Greet people at retail store. Company uniform required. Must be able to carry small children.' How hard can that be?"

"What'd you think the zipper on my face was for?"

'Igor, quit bugging me!'

"Yaffle: For the funny bone in you"

Scary Halloween ICD-10 codes.

'This is a real barnburner.'

"I'm your Furry Godmother."

"I think they may have rumbled me, Sarge."