Marriage Proposal Ponderer Gifts

"Your boyfriend can't even come to the door? Jeez..."

'The bad news is you're going to marry a geek, and not a pro athlete. The good news is the geek owns the team.'

"Darling, I think we need to talk about where this relationship is going..." Male evolution.

"Before I do this, I would ask everyone to please delete the footage in the event of this not going as planned."

"Dave, could you hold on a sec while I take care of some personal business?"

"Well, he promised you the moon and stars."

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

'Sorry, but we're not compatible, Jim. You keep a diary, and I blog on the Internet.'

"Look - I'm cold, you're cold. Why don't we settle down and start a family?"

"I want to get married and start a family with you—although God knows who I'll want to finish it with."

'He said he wasn't good enough for me, so I married him because he's the first man to realize that.'

'Sorry, but my car is a hybrid and I wouldn't accept anything less in a husband.'

Will you be mine?

"This may be Malcolm Gladwell talking, but we were married on the wrong day!"

"I do like you, Peter, but interfacing is a very serious step."

'Marry me, and make me the happiest man in the world.' 'You want BOTH?!'

Various Traps.

"She signed a prenup promising not to eat me and then ate the lawyer."

Recycled passion.

"A cluck cluck here and a cluck cluck there,...is that all I meant to you?"

'Do your lawyers have to be here?'

'It was so romantic. He got down on one knee, showed me the ring, and proposed--right after we exchanged credit reports.'

"I can only give you country walks in springtime and a hand to hold when leaves begin to fall. It's in the prenuptial agreement. Check it out."

'If you're proposing, Nigel, get it done before full time!'

'I'll crunch the numbers and get back to you.'

"This doesn't have anything to do with the falling price of oil, does it?"

Attention Span Man

The proposal.

"Have you forgotten you're proposing?"

"Will you sign a legally binding contract to get the state involved if you ever decide to leave me?"

Cook asking for her vinaigrette after recieving an offer from the dustman

"Oh Adam. This is the second...sorry, I mean third happiest day of my life."

"I'll have to go now, Penny. My boyfriend keeps wittering on about something or other!"

"Being a celebrated artist, I do sometimes wonder why you never celebrate me."

"If you were the only man in the world, and I were the only woman. . . would we still have to diet?"