Marriage And Divorce Commentator Gifts

'Eemember her big white wedding? Now she's planning a little black divorce.'

"Bob & Sue 2011" "Sued Bob 2011"

'No, but thanks for asking.'

"This not the way I envisioned falling in love."

'Someday, Son, all this will be your ex-wife's.'

'Your therapy helped me leave Frank. Franks wants to thank you personally.'

'It isn't supposed to taste good. It's furniture polish.'

"It's a legal document authorizing you to carry out a Do Not Resuscitate order on my behalf, although heaven knows, you have a hard enough time cancelling a magazine subscription."

'No, he didn't have any last words,his wife was in there and she did all of the talking right up to the end.'

'There's a NAGGING blog?'

Man in traffic jam watches couple row while eating popcorn.

"Oh, you were on automatic pilot? And what about her? Was she on automatic pilot, too?"

We would have come to you sooner, but he wouldn't ask for directions.

'Her being multi-lingual has it's drawbacks I'm afraid-she nags me in SIX languages!'

'oh...You're home, just when my spirits were rising.'

Marriage & Divorce.

"I don't see what you see in him."

"Now who's being judgy?"

"I can try, but I've never had a marriage overturned on appeal."

'So is this your lazy days of summer, or are we still working on spring?'

"I did warn you. Mum can take her time warming to a new boyfriend."

"Our guest is Dr. Paul Veblin, renowned marriage counselor and resident of nearby Southport, where he lives with his 6th wife."

'How many husbands have I had? Do you mean excluding my own?'

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

'My husband's first name? Heck, I don't know! I call him `wimp` since we met the first time'!

'So, did your marriage counseling work?', 'It sure did! -- She ran off with the marriage counselor!'

'Here's a list of women I want you to stay away from at the party tonight.'

"And that's another thing, when did you last take me out ?"

"Yes I know...she just needs a passport!"

'I'm no good at sports, so I'll just have to settle for a trophy wife.'

"Yes, it was good for me - not as good as it was the last time, but probably better than it's going to be the time after this."

"I liked you better as my first husband."

'I'm sorry, but according to this there's nothing I can do. It appears your species mates for life.'

'We have separate bedrooms because I snore and because I can't stand the sight of her.'