Marketing Whiz Gifts

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

'Seminar to you market your practice...be there.'

"Here's the artist's conception of your proposed smile."

'For a chance to win back your wallet, visit my website and complete the online survey.'

'Ok, I'll be your spokes person just rub my tummy and it's a deal!'

"Buy it and I'll get it off you."

Golf Sale Past the Birdie Shop Next to the Chip Shop

"Do you need me to write in big letters for you?"

Toothpaste Marketing Department

'Clever hey!...This way I've managed to triple my salary...'

'In 'No time'? In that case wrap it and I'll take it now!'

'I think I've cracked our marketing problem.'

'We want to focus on female customers. That's why we hired him. He is a real expert - women start shouting 'how sweeeet!' as soon as they notice him.'

"All it takes is a little marketing, Tia Carmen!"

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"There are the arts, the sciences, agriculture, and commerce. Stick with commerce, if you know what's good for you."

"You were right. Building an online business empire is even more fun than playing games."

'Keep asking for more allowance. It's good practice for negotiating future stock and option grants.'

A young boy sits behind a lemonade stand with a sign that reads "Lemonade 25¢ - Jay Antosh, Chief Executive Officer".

'Those are my twins: NASDAQ and Dow. They were born at the height of the dot.com boom.'

'How fast can you hype?'

'Almost finished.'

'Now all this stuff will finally begin to pay for itself - here's the formula for transmuting lead into gold.'

"Once you get over the three hundred and sixty eight texts it took to plan this, it really is nice to get together."

The Communicator

'We would deliver if we could cross the street.'

August is corporate earnings restatement season.

"I'm a pragmatist, Leon. Before I put a new product on the market, I ask myself, 'Will it sell?' "

"Now the first thing you have to do is to get a client's attention."

'I'd love to play house, Kevin, but I've got a business to run.'

Kid selling lemonade has a picture of the founder: himself

An overachieving headless chicken.