Market Crash Historian Gifts

'Your investments in sub prime mortgages have become collectors items now! Aren't you excited?'

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

The symbol for the euro (?) depicted as the wheel of a wheelchair, symbolising the state of the currency

"I don't consider a missing four million dollars to be 'monkeyshines'."

Tesla Shares Tanking Into Swastika

'Back in the day, you could leverage . . .'

'Stock Market re-entry now safe. . . City analysts say.'

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'If anyone just wants a quick turn down on a loan - I can help you here.'

'Here's the confirmation now, Mrs. Davis: You paid 14.4960937 per share. Kind of makes you homesick for eights and quarters, doesn't it?'

"I had money problems- forged fivers the wrong colour!"

The European Bailout

"...And, while fortunately, I am not losing my job...my heart goes out to those who are!"

'I need a government bailout.'

Easy street ends.

A vacancy in the Finance Department

Don't worry, when it's time to start jumping out of windows I'll tell you.

'Our new client wants to invest in high risk stocks, book my usual seat at the craps table.'

'Landsbanki collapses in October 2008 and affects thousands of investors,' - 'The 'Eyjafjallajokull' volcano erupts in April 2010 causing massive disruption to international airspace,' - 'The question you have to ask is, 'Did sacking Kerry Katona,,,'

'Using this, you will be able to get around the branches more quickly!'

"When European workers are losing their jobs because of an Asian stock market crash - that's the meaning of 'Globalization'."

Burnt Turkey

Dow Jones' Greatest Hits

Wall Street Devil.

"I told you it would be a mistake linking directors' pay to profits."

The End Is Nightly.

'Gracias Senora!'

What a punishment! But be strong - only ten more years to go!

'Instead of bankers, divide $700- billion among high schoolers on Friday, they spend it. And by Monday all that money is flowing up rhrough the economy, ending the recession!'

'I think the best time to sell this stock would be six months ago.'

Desert Accountant yells 'Liquidation! Liquidation!' as he crawls along

World Market Jitters...

We're all wearing arm bands. It's to mourn our stock losses.

'We save, Germans rob, Brussels spends.'

'Tax returns prepared - honest mistakes our speciality.'