Maritime Worker Gifts

'Women and children first!'

"Oh, I forgot to mention. A nice man came round this morning and changed that nasty big bulb for an energy efficient one."

Oil tanker and refinery.

"There's nothing wrong with the ship. We just got a better offer."

'What do you mean the men are unhappy! What on earth gives you that idea?'

Sailor with a wooden leg leaves his rowboat tied to a pier that is labeled with a disabled parking sign.

'Bugger!'

Pirate ship airbag.

Lighthouse

Ship's officers blaming each other for boat sinking.

Pirate playing pool using his artificial leg as a pool stick.

'You should have told me you couldn't do it with the light on before we got married!'

The Adventures of Eric the Lighthouse

"You're wanted on the phone, it's the coastguard."

'And if you say 'Worse things happen at sea' one more time, I'm going to shove this paddle right up your arse!'

Tugboat pulls along a rubber duck.

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

Ship

'This is a dolphin friendly boat.'

"What do you reckon, Dave, does this qualify as flotsam or jetsam"

Lighthouse switch

"Captain Hague to crew - steady as she goes!"

'The tender is your severance package, Queequeg. Bon voyage!'

Excessive breeding by large marine animals..

'I was just trying to dry some towels, sorry if I insulted you.'

'Thank goodness you're here!'

Getting Clobbered on RedditSputn

"Harumph. Some 'sailor man.'"

Captain Hook's lesser known brother - 'Captain Loofah Sponge'.

"It's just a whale, Captain … a really, really ticked-off whale."

"Looks like it's getting a bit choppy out there."

"I'm sure they are troubled waters, sir. But is that really going to help?"

Ever Given

Cargo Ship Backlog

"The captain is working remote today."