Maritime Mishap Enthusiast Gifts

An upside-down cruise liner in a bottle.

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

Santa Claus You Are Welcome.

'Well, it wasn't my lucky day... first there was that shark and then I bimped into a bunch of beaver!'

"He's a keeper!"

"Can I interest you in a great white?"

"Someone switched off the freezer...it's melted."

Sawfish cuts through the oars of row boat.

Selfie of the Golden Hinde

Ever Given

'I told you that parrot didn't know how to navigate.'

"Re-calculating, arrive at your final destination in six...five...four..."

Submariners' Eye Test.

Man tried to unload a ship in a bottle.

'What I need now is a good publicist...'

"May I suggest hard a-starboard, or port, or whatever!"

Deserted Island Logging

"What a beautiful day to set sail!"

'What do you mean you lost the keys?'

Lighthouse switch

Noah's Arc "And that's when I realized I had two of everything I needed, right in front of me, this whole time."

Desert Island with CCTV.

'FIRE A... warning shot across her bow.'

Angry pirate looking at angry parrot (wearing diaper) on his shoulder.

'A team meeting in 20 minutes seems appropriate.'

"Damn it, doesn't anybody on this ship have depth perception?"

Will you marry me?

Exempli Gratia.

Beacon Theatre

The skipper never wears a hat that fits. He's always been afraid of cap-sizing!

'And remember: this isn't a submarine!'

"He thinks he's located a World War I torpedo boat. What's exciting at your house?"

"Don't panic - just a temporary crash floe problem."

'I should've known better thank to park my car anywhere near where you dock your boat.'

'Before you judge the lookouts too harshly Captain, studies have shown that iceburgs DO tend to look like big, fluffy marshmallows after long sea journeys..."