Maritime Mischief Enthusiast Gifts

'FIRE A... warning shot across her bow.'

"As I was only saying the other day..."

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

'Let go of that balloon right now!'

A massive ship pulls in in Central Park.

Sea weed harvest.

'Look Reg, a ship...we're saved!'

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"Can I interest you in a great white?"

"He's a keeper!"

Selfie of the Golden Hinde

"Someone switched off the freezer...it's melted."

'And in addition it seems that he has been eating some of the other children'.

Sawfish cuts through the oars of row boat.

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

Ever Given

The Rind of the Ancient Mariner.

'I told you that parrot didn't know how to navigate.'

"Let’s draw him closer to New Bedford — we’ll get cell service there and Instagram the heck out of this!"

Dead Men Tell No Tales.

Submariners' Eye Test.

Man tried to unload a ship in a bottle.

'As a young rat, I traveled the world as a stowaway on a merchant navy ship...'

"Relax, Marge! I'm sure the folks at 'Ultimate Pirate Adventures'. . ."

The grazing deck of the Titanic.

'What I need now is a good publicist...'

Titanic 100th anniversary

"May I suggest hard a-starboard, or port, or whatever!"

"I bet you thought that because you'd been castaway for forty years, you'd get off with your six month prison sentence."

Lighthouse switch

'Todd here syas our plank is to narrow and may lead to lawsuits.'

"What a beautiful day to set sail!"

Noah's Arc "And that's when I realized I had two of everything I needed, right in front of me, this whole time."