Maritime Mischief Maker Gifts

'Congratulations! You have been chosen...'

A massive ship pulls in in Central Park.

"We haven't left port yet you dozy old duffer!"

"She's sinking alright, Captain. Even the rats are wearing life jackets!"

"Should we tell the captain about that approaching enemy ship?"

'Let go of that balloon right now!'

Swimming Prankster

Sawfish cuts through the oars of row boat.

'And in addition it seems that he has been eating some of the other children'.

"How the heck could you forget your sword?"

'Have you tried hitting Ctrl-Alt-Delete?'

'I told you that parrot didn't know how to navigate.'

Less expensive equivalent.

Knights

Submariners' Eye Test.

Doctor, I can't feel my legs! I know you can't, I had to amputate your arms.

"Sending out 1300 redundancy notices by mistake was a bit of a blooper!"

'FIRE A... warning shot across her bow.'

'But I only came in to have my appendix out!'

'Good news! Your positives look negative.'

'Hey buddy.Pass that bottle of ketch up here will ya'.'

"Oh my gosh babe! These cute little otters want us to play with them."

Desert Island Water skiing.

"My trun!!"

'Sam's not really a seafaring man but he can yo-ho-ho with the best of them.'

"Don't stare at his massive claw. . . don't stare at his massive claw. . ."

'Ok, that's fine! You have dibs on the big one. I prefer the skinnier ones anyway. They struggle more vigorously which, I think, enhances the taste.'

"I brought a six pack. Is that enough?"

'Not that babysitter again! Better behave or she zaps you...'

"That's not the boiling oil, that's my casserole!"

'Stop that Betty. We're here to fish, not to mess around.'

"Let's just make random clicking noises: it will keep the scientists busy for years trying to decipher our language..."

'I realize it's a bit strange, sir, but due to the new health information privacy laws, none of us is allowed to know your identity.'

'I've got acid indigestion.'

'A second opinion would be appreciated only if confirms my opinion.'