Maritime Merrymakers Gifts

You're stopping me for sailing & drinking? No sweat. I can swim in a strait line!

Sailor in Car.

A massive ship pulls in in Central Park.

Clownfish entertain sea life by hitting each other in the face with octopi.

Heroic Rescue from a Falling Tower

"You may be in love, but can you support my daughter on what a herring makes?"

That dolphin drinks like a fish.

'I told you that parrot didn't know how to navigate.'

Wedding Wellies

Reflex Testing -"...and you're sure you can't feel it"

"I just want to know if I'm healthy enough for bacon?"

Tugboat pulls along a rubber duck.

"She's sinking alright, Captain. Even the rats are wearing life jackets!"

"I realize your prescription bottle says 'Keep Tightly Closed', but you still need to take the medication!"

'Hey buddy.Pass that bottle of ketch up here will ya'.'

'Don't worry about the side effects. You already suffer from all the side effects caused by this medication.'

'Wait! Let me clip my nails first.'

'Sam's not really a seafaring man but he can yo-ho-ho with the best of them.'

'After paying for the boat, it's insurance, the docking and gas, I couldn't afford a trailer.'

The velcro ties were in place. The lobstermen would have no idea what hit them.'

'Ok, that's fine! You have dibs on the big one. I prefer the skinnier ones anyway. They struggle more vigorously which, I think, enhances the taste.'

"Damned fine divorce lawyer you turned out to be - when you said I'd have to give her half of everything, I never thought for one minute..."

"I brought a six pack. Is that enough?"

'I think there's something wrong with our navigational system, because judging by the icebergs, I don't think we're in the Caribbean.'

'Chapter one. Don't waste your money. Don't buy useless crap like this stupid book'.

"I suppose you think this will keep me home this summer."

Sooner or Later

"Why is it always snowing in that fish bowl?"

'Remember our last cruise The porthole is not a wall safe,'

Reindeer looking on with fear as Santa counts down and elf if about to launch sleigh with a giant slingshot.

Happy Whatever

'What's all the fuss about? We've been social networking for years.'

Fifty

'I'm here for making house calls to the homes of doctors at 3am.'

"We haven't left port yet you dozy old duffer!"