Maritime Master Gifts

"Mabel, you are becoming a control freak..."

For his next book, he would write an epic novel of the sea.

"Maybe the next one will be a singles cruise."

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

When laundry ruled the waves.

"As I was only saying the other day..."

'Maybe it should be funnier...'

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

'If we get out of this alive, I'm going to have a darn good look at your resume.'

"It's hard not to take a mutiny personally."

Sea weed harvest.

Captain looks out of a porthole and notices that the ship is sinking.

Pirate playing pool using his artificial leg as a pool stick.

"Can I interest you in a great white?"

"According to the map, we should be nearing the North Pole, but something tells me we’ve been reading the map upside down."

"He's a keeper!"

"There she be, lads, the special economic zone!"

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

Selfie of the Golden Hinde

What really happened on the EVER GIVEN

"Richard was recently promoted to first mate."

"Oh No!!!...Cap'n...Iceberg...Dead ahead!!"

On the plus side, I'd wager a lot of you folks back there had never seen an iceburg up close before.

"Someone switched off the freezer...it's melted."

Ever Given

"I am wearying of the crew's constant repetition of the same old sea shanties."

"International trade"

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"

Coastguard

"Gasp! Pant! Is it good for you, Marjorie?"

"Cheer up Skip - worse things happen at sea..."

Suez Canal Curse

'As a young rat, I traveled the world as a stowaway on a merchant navy ship...'