Marine Show Critic Gifts

Killer whale with dead trainer

'You can forget the Captain's table-we're not paying that kind of money just to eat with the crew!'

"...so it appears we were talking to his butt that entire time."

The Jolly Green Giant Squid

"Technically, it's a mammal."

"If you hold a shell to your ear you can hear the ocean..."

"I don't do windows."

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

Sperm Whale.

"I don't think I can fit that into my schedule, Irv. I've got a fishing boat to attack this morning, a beach to terrorize this afternoon and a feeding frenzy this evening!"

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

'I said: Leave my son alone!'

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

'Having eight hands should be a big advantage, but unfortunately, I am not so well coordinated...'

'CANNONBALL!!' - Whale tours.

'This is definitely not your typical beaching.'

Making fun of Starfish.

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

"Not more sleeve alterations?!"

"I've been at loose ends lately."

'Little is known about these amazing creatures, as there have only been a few live sightings, by giant squid scientists. Despite previous beliefs, they are actually a land animal, as the fins and respiratory system are removable.'

"What's the name of our sea?"

"This Save the Whales Number has got to go, pet."

Celebrate National Submarine Day.

"You see, I told you I could play the bugle and sing at the same time..."

Fish astronaut stands proudly on a beach.

"It's just me, the algae-eater. Mind if I tidy up a bit in here?"

"Alright be cool. We're just gonna ask for an autograph and be on our way."

Whale Watch Tours.

Plankton impersonator gets stuck in a whale.

'I got one this small.'

"Yeah you can pretty much get anything in Florida."