Magical Environmentalist Gifts

'It runs on batteries. I'm trying to become more green.'

The Jeopardy of Progress

Late Stage Capitalism and the Biosphere Engage in Some Meaningful Dialogue...

What are you giving Mother Earth this year?

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

'He's not a pet. He's an endangered species.'

The Solar System (after deregulation)

Humans...What is their purpose?

North Pole

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

Rare earths are the key to a greenwashed, technotopian future

THE PIED PIPER OF GRAMERCY PARK

'Don't feel bad — all tree huggers get a splinter now and then.'

Deforestation.

The Environmentalist

"Fred's calculating what future natural catastrophes he can ignore based on his probably life span."

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

Natural Disasters

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

Polluted geese

But is it organic?

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

"If oceans are absorbing more carbon dioxide, why isn't this water fizzy?"

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

"We just haven't been flapping them hard enough."

Wind-generated power. Wind turbines attached to Battersea Power Station's iconic chimneys

"We finally reached net zero emissions."

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"We'll always have Paris..."

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

"Wait—did you procure that worm humanely?"

The interested bystanders.

How can he sleep so comfortably knowing that pillow will someday be clogging a land fill...