Magic Mixer Pillows

Forget the potions. This Halloween I'm working on a vaccine.

"Where did you say you went to culinary school?"

'This is taking forever. We should've just microwaved it.'

'..and one for the pot.'

Magic Potion Micro-Brewers

"Ah-sod it! I think I'll get a takeaway instead..."

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"An everything Martini, please."

Major Bunker (who has been persuaded to join in a game of hockey for the first time, absent-mindedly preparing to drive). 'Force.'

'My analysis indicates the need for an asbestos-ectomy, electrical-graphs and a plumbing-bypass.'

'I feel cosmopolitan tonight, Joe - Give me a scotch with an irish Chaser.'

'Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream...'

The eye of newt - Is it gluten-free?

"No, I'm still getting too much banjo."

Bloke orders a pizza as Jesus divides the loafs and fishes

Books and Phones

Dan tells me you're an architect. That is so cool! Thanks! Cloud architect, actually.

'I don't like the mediciney taste of this mouthwash either. I hate that taste of eyes of newt and turtle brains first thing in the morning.'

"Are you sure? It doesn't look like a diet pill!"

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Congerto Number One, first movement."

Nun reading 'Halo' magazine

Man holding up a cowboy with his TV remote control.

'The cauldron is just for the sauce - I do the rest in my microwave.'

Shake well before using.

"What the hell was in that?!"

Wee Acid Hoose - Drugs and Scottish Reels

"Bloody Cyclops!"

"Bretheren and Sistern out there in Congregational Land!"

Wow. That WAS a lot faster.

Hey, those are not menus!

House trained cat

Turn this music off! Please. Thumpa thump … Thank goodness. This is insane. How can they combine a talk show with house music? Allow us to explain: To attract younger audiences, we, the media conglomerates, must communicate on their terms, on their wavelength. More media, multimedia, simultaneous media, streaming screaming gleaming screeching grinding mind-bending media! I'm going to kill something! You're playing into their hands. Thumpa thumpa thumpa.

'Eye of newt, toe of frog, ear of bat and tongue of dog - everything but bloody coffee!'

Library computer center: CYBRARIAN.

Witching Hour