Macho Humor Aficionado Gifts

'I told you it was a full bodied wine, but you just had to mess with it.'

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

Department of Who's Your Daddy?

Soldiers' Ego

"He thinks that if they really want to smash the stereotype then he should be a shoe-in for the next Bond."

"He's got a man cave, a work cave, and a cave cave."

Man with many tattoos.

"Come on. One more. You got it..." "It's so cute when they do that."

"There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you....He weeps when you mercilessly mock him and all that he holds dear....It also weeds out the 'men' who are afraid to cry."

'That rig has made me feel more like a man than any woman ever did.'

'John's hiding. I expect His wife gave him quiche again for lunch.'

Arm and leg wrestling.

'My speed limit is bigger than yours.'

Rhinovirus (Common Cold) vs Rhinovirus-M (Man Cold)

"Remember that weekend in Saint-Tropez when you tried to eat my small intestine?"

BEWARE of man-eating palm tree.

"If it's your chair, man up and get him out of it!"

"Your old boyfriend came by. He wants to patch things up."

The Men Thing. . .

'He's a big softie really'.

"Mom said grandpa killed it so his penis would feel bigger."

Macho Males: Putin and Obama

'Bad hairy-chest day.'

'Oh yeah? Step outside and say that!'

'Yes, this bike complies with the town's new noise pollution laws, but we've programmed this MP3 player with brrroom brrroom sounds, so you can still feel macho while riding it.'

Extreme sports psychologist.

'Remember, talk up your athlete's foot -- it's the most macho thing about you.'

"Now that's a splinter."

Clancy: Snake

'What? You wanna piece of me too, Bub?'

'I like my guys tough, you know, the kind who leave the crusts on their sandwiches.'

"I don't even like bacon that much, but eat a lot of it to impress chicks."

'He turned out hard boiled.'