Macho Man Enthusiast Gifts

"There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you....He weeps when you mercilessly mock him and all that he holds dear....It also weeds out the 'men' who are afraid to cry."

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

Important Muscles.

Sylvester Stallone

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

Soldiers' Ego

Alpha males through the ages!

"He's got a man cave, a work cave, and a cave cave."

"Science has proven that if you don't know what you're talking about, people will still take you seriously if you act like you do...Especially if you back it up by saying 'Science has proven' it."

"Wanna come over and watch the big game?....I was actually talking about the new 'Pac-Man vs. Superman' X-box game."

"This is all my own hair."

"One last question, Berlinger. Is it just you, or is the whole damn Accounting Department shot full of steroids?"

Man with many tattoos.

"If he'd done that to me, I'd have got up and given him a good thump!"

"Football and hunting - what more could you ask for?"

"Come on. One more. You got it..." "It's so cute when they do that."

'John's hiding. I expect His wife gave him quiche again for lunch.'

'That rig has made me feel more like a man than any woman ever did.'

'That's a good start, Betsy, but could you make it more macho?'

"Take no notice of George - it's just because he opened a jam jar earlier!"

Arm and leg wrestling.

'I want my money back -- I'm still a wuss.'

'Will you sorry excuse for Vikings shut up and go to sleep?!'

Bill just couldn't wait for his testosterone to kick in.

"Okay boys, time to maintain a delicate ecological balance between man and beast."

"Your old boyfriend came by. He wants to patch things up."

Rhinovirus (Common Cold) vs Rhinovirus-M (Man Cold)

"I recommend the lobster today, sir, if you think you're man enough."

"Leave it, Cedric! - It's always the same; you have a few drinks and all you want to do is take the world on. . .!"

Macho Males: Putin and Obama

The Men Thing. . .

'He's a big softie really'.

I have an awful headache. Do you have an aspirin? Not so fast, little buddy. A real man doesn't mask his symptoms with pharmaceuticals. Even if it feels like a jackhammer on his forehead, a real man grits his teeth and bears it. A real man rides it out the way he'd ride out a bucking bronco. Not everything in life is a test of my manhood. A real man would beg to differ.