Macho Enthusiast Gifts

Arm and leg wrestling.

'Oh yeah? Step outside and say that!'

The Men Thing. . .

'I like my guys tough, you know, the kind who leave the crusts on their sandwiches.'

'John's hiding. I expect His wife gave him quiche again for lunch.'

'Bad hairy-chest day.'

Soldiers' Ego

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

Alpha males through the ages!

"He thinks that if they really want to smash the stereotype then he should be a shoe-in for the next Bond."

"He's got a man cave, a work cave, and a cave cave."

Man with many tattoos.

"One last question, Berlinger. Is it just you, or is the whole damn Accounting Department shot full of steroids?"

"Come on. One more. You got it..." "It's so cute when they do that."

'That rig has made me feel more like a man than any woman ever did.'

"Take no notice of George - it's just because he opened a jam jar earlier!"

"There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you....He weeps when you mercilessly mock him and all that he holds dear....It also weeds out the 'men' who are afraid to cry."

"Your old boyfriend came by. He wants to patch things up."

Rhinovirus (Common Cold) vs Rhinovirus-M (Man Cold)

"If it's your chair, man up and get him out of it!"

'Will you sorry excuse for Vikings shut up and go to sleep?!'

Bill just couldn't wait for his testosterone to kick in.

'He's a big softie really'.

Macho Males: Putin and Obama

"Mom said grandpa killed it so his penis would feel bigger."

'Yes, this bike complies with the town's new noise pollution laws, but we've programmed this MP3 player with brrroom brrroom sounds, so you can still feel macho while riding it.'

'Remember, talk up your athlete's foot -- it's the most macho thing about you.'

"Now that's a splinter."

'Do you have a hat for every day of the week, Clancy?'

'I told you it was a full bodied wine, but you just had to mess with it.'

Clancy: Snake

'He turned out hard boiled.'

"Howard is my most male friend."

"Can you open this form me?"