Macho Men Admirer Gifts

"One last question, Berlinger. Is it just you, or is the whole damn Accounting Department shot full of steroids?"

Alpha males through the ages!

Sylvester Stallone

Soldiers' Ego

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

"He's got a man cave, a work cave, and a cave cave."

Have you ever sued anyone for slander or libel, Randy? Indeed I have, little buddy. It was 1979. Francis Melba stood up in the middle of the cafeteria and accused me - in front of all the other kids - of being "nothing special." So I stood atop my table, ripped my shirt in two, slowly smoothed out my mustache, and then proceeded to flex my pecs, one at a time. HOJ. The sunlight streaming in through the windows scattered off my bouncing pecs like a disco ball. That's when Melba knew he was toast.

Man with many tattoos.

"Come on. One more. You got it..." "It's so cute when they do that."

'John's hiding. I expect His wife gave him quiche again for lunch.'

"Take no notice of George - it's just because he opened a jam jar earlier!"

"There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you....He weeps when you mercilessly mock him and all that he holds dear....It also weeds out the 'men' who are afraid to cry."

'That rig has made me feel more like a man than any woman ever did.'

Arm and leg wrestling.

Rhinovirus (Common Cold) vs Rhinovirus-M (Man Cold)

"Leave it, Cedric! - It's always the same; you have a few drinks and all you want to do is take the world on. . .!"

Bill just couldn't wait for his testosterone to kick in.

"Your old boyfriend came by. He wants to patch things up."

'My speed limit is bigger than yours.'

'Will you sorry excuse for Vikings shut up and go to sleep?!'

"If it's your chair, man up and get him out of it!"

'He's a big softie really'.

"Mom said grandpa killed it so his penis would feel bigger."

'Bad hairy-chest day.'

Macho Males: Putin and Obama

I have an awful headache. Do you have an aspirin? Not so fast, little buddy. A real man doesn't mask his symptoms with pharmaceuticals. Even if it feels like a jackhammer on his forehead, a real man grits his teeth and bears it. A real man rides it out the way he'd ride out a bucking bronco. Not everything in life is a test of my manhood. A real man would beg to differ.

The Men Thing. . .

'Oh yeah? Step outside and say that!'

'My mom would never let me get one before.'

'Remember, talk up your athlete's foot -- it's the most macho thing about you.'

"Now that's a splinter."

"Reggie 'The Butcher' Baker just found out that everyone knows his wife calls him 'love dumpling'."

"Hey, Henry! How's the car?"

Clancy: Snake

'I like my guys tough, you know, the kind who leave the crusts on their sandwiches.'