Machine Lovers Gifts

"When you're done here can you look at my laptop?"

"I find things go around in cycles."

Throw you away

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

'Hey, are you like me? Do you hate mowing around trees? ell, then THIS is the machine for you!'

Crane fishing

"From the wind, the chill and the snow, a god is born."

'What do you mean, you want a coffee break?!'

"A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer."

Army Leader: 'We have ways of making you Torque.'

"Et tu, Killbot 9000?"

"On your mark! Get set!"

Obsolete: Any piece of machinery that you bought last week for $100,000.

"You know the great thing about human beings? They're biodegradable."

Bagging the Chipmunk

"Your steak's prepared in the firebox of a 17th century tank engine - unfortunately sir, the chef can't confirm if it has 0-60T wheel arrangement or not."

Man checks the gears in his chest.

'I almost read an instruction manual from cover-to-cover once.'

Elephant with front end loader using tusks.

A cheese grader

Psychiatry. Your disorientation is number 2248 in my psychiatry manual. You mean my daze is numbered?

Kids hiding plug to giant machine.

ROBOT EMPLOYMENT AGENCY, 'We don't have much on hand right now --how'd you like to be a Pez dispenser?'

Lighting a Pipe

Combined Harvester

'On','Off', and 'Maybe' switches.

"Err... Excuse me Sir, you've forgotten the user manual for your super mini mobile."

Cat flap for a truck.

Ski Vagaries in Switzerland

'My hybrid car gets better gas mileage than me.'

'Sergeant! Wake up the lazer guided slaughter-bot. We have a mission for him.'; Reply - 'But he looks so peaceful, Sir.'

Milk production

The Robot's Trophy