Luggage Luckster Gifts

'I had the weirdest experience just now -- I got off the plane and found my luggage right away!'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'What's with the overnight bag, Orville?'

Travelling

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

Airport

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

Excess Baggage: Before starting your rental car, be sure the radio is turned all the way down.

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Airport

"This trip, we'd like to go everywhere our luggage goes."

"Sorry, sir. The baggage must match the passenger."

"I'd pack light if it wasn't for the shoes."

'HA! This time, I thought of my passport! It's right here, in my jackets' inside-pocket!'

"How's my tripping you up?"

An argument between a passenger and a train porter.

Woman goes to Origami Airport.

'Arrivals and Departures - this railroad governed by Heisenberg's uncertainty principle'

"We'll let you know when we find your luggage. Meanwhile, you qualified for our frequent lost luggage club."

"You overpacked again."

"So this is where it all ends up. . ."

Excess Baggage: Meanwhile, back at baggage handlers university...

'Next time I insist on flying first class!'

'No, the sign's not wrong. Most of our guests like to party all night.'

'Don't you think it's time we bought new suitcases?'

Baggage Claim

Lost luggage turning up on Mars.

Excess Baggage: Perhaps you should have washed those clothes before returning home from your overseas vacation.

'Pack this yourself, Miss?' (Nelly the elephant at customs).

"I would have left a long time ago, but I could never find luggage I really liked."

Traveller with a globe on the front of his car.

"We found our luggage in Cabo, but it's way happier there and isn't coming back."