Luggage Luckster Gifts

'I had the weirdest experience just now -- I got off the plane and found my luggage right away!'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'What's with the overnight bag, Orville?'

Travelling

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Airport

Excess Baggage: Before starting your rental car, be sure the radio is turned all the way down.

Airport

"This trip, we'd like to go everywhere our luggage goes."

'HA! This time, I thought of my passport! It's right here, in my jackets' inside-pocket!'

"Sorry, sir. The baggage must match the passenger."

"I'd pack light if it wasn't for the shoes."

"How's my tripping you up?"

"They said whatever you left in Las Vegas, stays in Las Vegas."

An argument between a passenger and a train porter.

Woman goes to Origami Airport.

'Arrivals and Departures - this railroad governed by Heisenberg's uncertainty principle'

"So this is where it all ends up. . ."

"We'll let you know when we find your luggage. Meanwhile, you qualified for our frequent lost luggage club."

'Next time I insist on flying first class!'

"You overpacked again."

Excess Baggage: Meanwhile, back at baggage handlers university...

'No, the sign's not wrong. Most of our guests like to party all night.'

'Don't you think it's time we bought new suitcases?'

"Just barking will do."

Baggage Claim

Lost luggage turning up on Mars.

All gates.

Excess Baggage: Perhaps you should have washed those clothes before returning home from your overseas vacation.

'Pack this yourself, Miss?' (Nelly the elephant at customs).

"I would have left a long time ago, but I could never find luggage I really liked."

Traveller with a globe on the front of his car.