Luggage Loser Gifts

'This could get tricky, sir -- a Bosnian separatist group has your luggage.'

"We'll let you know when we find your luggage. Meanwhile, you qualified for our frequent lost luggage club."

"So this is where it all ends up. . ."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

'What's with the overnight bag, Orville?'

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

Technique #54 airlines are adopting for handling excessive carry on luggage.

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

Excess Baggage: Before starting your rental car, be sure the radio is turned all the way down.

Airport

"This trip, we'd like to go everywhere our luggage goes."

"How's my tripping you up?"

"I'd pack light if it wasn't for the shoes."

"Sorry, sir. The baggage must match the passenger."

Woman goes to Origami Airport.

'My husband, Bill, works at the airport - I still haven't opened my birthday presents from three years ago.'

An argument between a passenger and a train porter.

"You are here, but you should be in class!"

'Arrivals and Departures - this railroad governed by Heisenberg's uncertainty principle'

"You overpacked again."

'No luggage.'

'Next time I insist on flying first class!'

'No, the sign's not wrong. Most of our guests like to party all night.'

Airline concerns.

"We're thinking... this year just send us to whatever country our luggage is accidentally sent to!"

'Don't you think it's time we bought new suitcases?'

Baggage Claim

Seagulls landing

Lost luggage turning up on Mars.

'Pack this yourself, Miss?' (Nelly the elephant at customs).

"I would have left a long time ago, but I could never find luggage I really liked."

'Oh look! We must be coming into land at Heathrow.'

Traveller with a globe on the front of his car.

"We found our luggage in Cabo, but it's way happier there and isn't coming back."