Location Loser Gifts

"You are here, but you should be in class!"

The fate of the emigrant

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

'Great news, Dear! I've been traded to a think tank in California for a PhD Specializing in the Baltics!'

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

'I think I know what the problem is!'

"But if you leave New Orleans, you'll be just another sandwich."

"Cancel the trip. The cook didn't get a visa."

You are here.

'WOW! This ladies' nav app is fantastic!'

"I honored her every request except for the last one: 'Harold, please stop making a scene'."

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

"I thought they just hibernated for the winter."

Oh boy, lucky you were there: I was cramping up. I need a few minutes rest if you don't mind...

"I know. I miss him, too."

'We like to spend 51 weeks of the year at our Florida holiday home...'

Emigrating to France.

"I found the perfect job! You don't do any work, stay at home, make funny videos, and you get full salary and benefits!!"

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

The Near Outback: Lenny and Samantha

'We can mortgage your future for a very attractive low interest rate.'

'I should've never sold my truck when I moved to the city.'

"When he asked us to help him move, I didn't know he meant south."

Highway Advisory - Move to Arizona.

"For years after Vietnam, I woke up screaming about the cold weather in Toronto."

'One ticket to wherever my luggage is going, please.'

"I'm transferring you to our new Asian affiliate, Hawkins. It'll be a great Korea move for you."

Entering New York City - Check it out

Broken Heart