Luddite Sympathizer Gifts

'Unfortunately illuminating the strike placards could take a few years.'

Mom & Pops General Store - Free Hi-Fi

"We were looking for a non-hackable, energy efficient data center. Thanks for the file cabinet."

"Dammit all, haven't they heard of e-mail?"

Pensioners and Phones

"I didn't come all this way to do work."

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

"I enjoy the one day of the school year...that I didn't forget to do my homework."

I've been feeling sluggish lately.

"It's another e-mail from your folks. You know, this would be a whole lot easier if you'd just tell them about the Web."

"It's a smart toaster. If you can't figure it out, press the 'Dumb It Down' button."

Under zealous: ZZZZZZ!

"Won't your boss miss you?"

"Here's the problem. Your computer isn't obsolete, you are."

'Word came from on high that managers had to develop their IT skills...'

"It's called a mobile... but I've been here an hour and have yet to see it move."

"I've gone for a retro phone."

"Judging by all the hair you've pulled out of your head, I must be hard to teach technology to than I thought."

Scary Slug Stories

Neighbourhood watch and slug watch.

Snail to Slug.

"Reboot? I've kicked it six times, but it still won't work?"

"Stop doggin' it!"

"Do you mean good, or good for a pumpkin?"

"Why would I upload my files to a computer?"

"Look mate, I keep rebooting and nothing happens!!"

"My four-year-old son usually helps me, but he's at his grandparents' home."

"We're going to have to erase your search history."

"These caseloads are impossible I've got TWICE the number I should I can't be in two places at once!"

'I'm happy to say that both parties agree on the issue. It's got bi-partisan non-support.'

Now, this is a good garden: full of weeds! The likelyhood of somebody trying to poison us here is very low...

'I know but I have to consider him irreplaceable until I figure out what he does around here.'

'You wanted to see me when I woke up?'

"Brian says in 1976 we just got on with it."

Technophobes Illustrated Dictionary : "I. P. Address - The answer to the question, "Where is the bathroom?"